Go Jump in a Lake

                                 Go Jump in a Lake



Polar bear Connie Island. I would rather be in this cold as Heck waterthan swim in any lake ocean or pool that i cannot touch the bottom. lol

I decided to swim across a lake this past weekend and it was probably not the smartest thing I have ever done. No, it was probably the dumbest thing I have ever done. I knew that if I swam across a lake that I could not possibly do, I would go at least more than halfway and need to complete it or drown. I know under these circumstances, I seem to rise to the top. I also thought that when I swim this lake, I can definitely swim the race course on my upcoming sprint triathlon. To be honest, I thought the lake was exactly the length of the swim part of this triathlon.

For safety, I asked a very close friend of mine to swim along side of me on a raft. Yes, this defeats the purpose of me thinking I am going to die thus keeping me swimming 'til I complete the lake. Well without knowing this, I got just what I wanted.

The woman agreed and we both set off to conquer the lake. I was swimming in a fashion that I have most recently learned by watching a clip on my computer. I am not confident in the crawl, so I just started out with the breaststroke and relaxed.

I was swimming for some time and was reassured that the sounds of the woman kicking the raft along side of me was my safety net. OH MY LORD! She had never left the shore and I was more than halfway across the lake! I now was just in the situation that I never wanted to be in. Have you ever heard of the phrase "dumb ass"? Well, you can say it now! I give you full permission. Paul Gaipo is a DUMB ASS! lol

                                                                            
Okay, now here I am, fully at ease and actually in a bit of a euphoric state because I am not tired at all and know I can finish this silly feat I set myself up for. I continued swimming but my stroke was getting lazy. My breathing was getting way too shallow and then I was trying to touch the bottom. These are all signs of being about to get into a panic state. I have seen it a million times in my life. I worked my way through it but then, all of a sudden, after doing all the resting strokes I could muster up from my youth, I looked into the water and saw this huge, all white from death, fish slumped over a rock just under my feet. I, at that moment, for a mere second, PANICKED! It could have been the death of me but I caught myself. I simply said 'Finish this damn swim and get the crap out of the water. You will touch yucky stuff. It will not harm you. You will be grossed out from the gook, muck and all sorts of dead things.' You see folks out there in Blog Land, this side of the lake has not been used by the population thus it is raw; untouched by the humanoids of the world.

Okay, I am on the other side of the lake and out of the water. I surely pushed myself to the limits because I had a splitting headache from such a depletion of all oxygen stores in my muscles. It was my guts that got me through this swim. Not my talents or my incredible physical state, but my guts. GUTS is what I will need to drag my old and tired body across the finish line when my limbs refuse to move. GUTS have taken many a warrior over the finish line.

I decided to walk back to the swim beach on the other side (duh). lol When I got there I was a bit disappointed in the lady that did not even try to accompany me to the other side of the lake. Everyone knew I could barely swim, let alone try to swim to the other side of this lake. Yes I was a DUMB ASS, but you don't let someone commit self sacrifice do ya now? Well, it turns out that the lady I asked to help me could not swim at all! That would have been nice to know. Her friends told her to come back. Okay, this I can understand but now why did they not send anyone else to make sure I did not die? The fact is anyone can panic, as I told you I did for a second. Anyone can get a cramp. Bottom line, anything can happen. There were perfectly good swimmers in our group. I asked one lady why she did not let her practically Olympic swimmer daughter come with ME. Her answer was, "it was after 5pm and it was getting late". Actually she meant, " I don't like you and you are a DUMB ASS!" lol

I looked up at the lake and guess what? It was three times the distance of my upcoming sprint triathlon. I know now that I will not drown, especially all psyched up and full of adrenaline.